Δευτέρα, 25 Ιανουαρίου 2010

Τα καλύτερά μας είναι μετά τα 40!


H probability of an internal turmoil increases when the years we still have to live is less than what we have already experienced. And yet, this period of life hidden opportunities, if you recognize will help us put together a solid foundation for the years akolouthoun.O zois Se first record of this phase of life is preparing a major change in human psychisSchedon all people, when they arrive in the early period of life that we tend to call "middle age, are faced with something similar: There, that is above the peak of their lives, to" better years ", they begin to not feel well, is not satisfied to see the 'dark'. Many make the first "review" and tortured by doubts and concerns: • Many of those who believed, thought done properly and by then may suddenly appear to be boring, meaningless or even incorrect. • Aisthanontai often stable, long-term relationship not their longer fully satisfy, to the limit, think how it would be if they had another partner. • TOP long dream that somewhere without phones, boring social obligations, traffic chaos, banks, shops. • Archizoun sometimes to challenge the professional status, review their choices, to "dig up" professional talents and dreams that have not followed ever wonder what the point of their activities. • Epitychimenes, independent women they catch themselves to dream the "good" a rich marriage, while men 'the' have failed 'begin to count the years they have left as the preparation and perhaps for the first time wondering if we really want to continue to toil through the same routine, which not infrequently is exhaustive and devastating. People in the middle of their lives discovering new, unknown, often unexpected aspects of themselves. They say or do, things they had never gone through the mind or find a sudden interest in people previously thought to be uninteresting and insignificant. • To top it all, and also displayed various disturbing physical changes. Except for the first wrinkles and white hair at the temples, which are becoming more and more, many feel an inexplicable and constant tiredness or weakness and blues, without a reason. It is as if they suddenly start, somewhere between 35 and 45, to "leave the path of" things that worked and worked until then without any problems. What is happening? An "silent revolution" For psychologists and sociologists who deal with the changes that occur at different stages of human life, the specificity of the average age is just that everything is done on "silent." Many call the changes occurring at this stage 'silent revolution'. One of the "fathers of psychoanalysis, the Elvetos Carl Jung, wrote for that age:" At this stage of life is preparing a major change in the human soul. Katarchin certainly not a deliberate and dramatic change is mainly indirect evidence of change, which seems to be starting in the subconscious. While throughout the life changing things are fluid-which is especially noticeable during childhood, adolescence and the first juvenile-age, we begin to face life as a given, stable and unchanged after 25-30, ie when the 'external' circumstances (family, profession, place of residence) further stabilized. H evolutionary psychology, until fairly recently, facing adulthood as a period of stagnation, which arrived as the elderly, so that was no reason for the beginning of a decline. Ayti perception revised themselves evolutionary psychologists. Because, although the main component, the core of our personality does not change significantly, the experiences, our experiences lead us to treat things differently, to search for new ways to satisfy their emotional needs, that we continue to evolve . In middle age, then, life changing form, and this change is something of a "shirt" that changed the insects and erpeta.O fear of the second half of zoisAftes the gradual, almost imperceptible change processes cause confusion, agitation, and not infrequently fear and denial. According to Jung, "as the child faces the world with fear and life, which is unknown, so frightened and the adult in front of the second half of life, as if waiting for him there unknown, and dangerous problems like the loss threatens and sacrifices can not take ...». The reactions are justified. Indeed, at this age expect everyone unknown, new difficulties and losses. However, it seems that they have so much to do with the biological and physical changes that occur during this period, even with the threat of "grave". That seems to employ torture and more middle aged people is that things are starting to "finalized" more. With every decision taken in the past, excluded any chance, some alternatives entered the room, some roads closed themselves. And what scares me is the outcome. He was correct these decisions? Mipos things were better prospects and more if one had followed another path? How late are for big changes? What is now to wait? The "stable" of life shake, like two-internal conflict - worlds: one who has set up to here with this beginning to setup and who is still unknown and adiamorfotos.Dyo extreme attitudes towards krisiOi subtle changes concern middle-aged and arnisiO each has its own way to react to this internal conflict . Some, perhaps more conservative, anchored as stable have put aside their doubts and questions and kept "with tooth and nail" from what is known and certainly by refusing to change anything. But that may prevent a balance of personality, which is in turmoil. Apofefgontas the challenges of middle age, may be lost opportunities for development, which is necessary to address the new phase of life that follows. On the other hand, there are impulsive, the unbridled, they see the only solution to get rid of the doubt to destroy everything shook and to rebuild from scratch. The problem with such a radical change is that at this age a lot of what we have built are now part of ourselves which, if lost, can be left unfulfilled void. What leaves us to do? That confirms that studies of evolutionary psychologists is that changes occur suggest, for most people, moving inwards to the internal search. While that is in the first half of life in the "structure" of our lives over to the professional, family and social basis for creating the second half looking more into us how to derive satisfaction from within this structure, for things that give it noima.Pos value and change the external conditions.Member average age marks a shift towards internal anazitisiPrepei therefore antimeto-pisoume some issues raised at this stage of life more intensely than ever and we can not ignore that: • The average age it is time to make sure that we are the most independent of other people. That does not mean either that we must live alone or that we do not need love, companionship, support, care of others. But we in this period of our lives our relationships with others more determined by our desire to be with them, than on any kind of dependence could have them. • O role of family and children varies and this period is good to find one interesting and outside the family. Otherwise, things may be difficult for everyone personally, but also the relationship of the couple, who will stay again at some point "alone, without children. • At the same time, it is necessary to realize that the family of origin, Our parents say, no longer able, or will in future give us confidence and protection; however, the roles may be reversed and we should no longer protect them and to change himself frontizoume.Pos masTora can have more moments of "small daily happiness» H doubt and questions of this period is a good opportunity to. .. put aside illusions about ourselves, with our abilities and the image of ourselves that we show to others. Often occurs in middle age feel and realize suddenly that we display to others a "facade" that can not be false, but only a small part of ourselves. Ie Can we give undue weight to the impeccable appearance or want to show always happy and cheerful, or rather, very modest and cool. That must be natural, but may now feel the need to give more "space" in parts of ourselves most neglected. Can, for example, a woman who was always 'the hair' feel the need to show not always so perfect. Or another, who hid her femininity behind a girl, sloppy appearance, wanting to show and felt herself "more woman". One key requirement in middle age is the desire something from what we do is important for others. Not to be is that only utilitarian and ephemeral, but have value to other people and to become, perhaps, as virtual legacy will link it to your face. This can be done when we transmit to others-our children, younger-our own skills, knowledge, experience or just when we share with them experiences and memories that are important to us. As, however, say the experts investigating the circumstances of middle age, when addressing the difficulties and disputes of this period, one can see life more realistically and to get more light, ie to enjoy the sun and the sea, without Tighten to hide the belly, which inflates a little more. Now you can have more moments of "small daily happiness.

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